“To 2012, may it suck less”… (In where our heroine learns that sometimes, life imitates art)…
That was our bravely optimistic toast as we brazenly ushered in the New Year. At the time it was a cautiously optimistic challenge. The universe took it somewhat differently. It appears that it was a defiant challenge to see, just see what we were made of. Remember in that one movie when the goofily optimistic, yet courageous protagonist boldly proclaims to his bedraggled and weary ka-tet, “But it can’t get any worse!”. Always a cringe-worthy moment. But this wasn’t cinema. This was Real Life. And in Real Life, there are no crescendos and epic montages where it all gets resolved and we move on, stronger and wiser.
No. Progress happens at a snail’s pace. Especially when you are, as my dear friend Elizabeth is fond of saying, “going through it.”
I am not even attempting to say that 2012 was sucky. Or terrible. Or the worst of times. Hell, the world didn’t even end! But there were moments, boy howdy, were there some moments. Moments where, if this were a sitcom, someone in the daily meetings would consider cancelling the show, “because it’s just such a “downer, man.”
There were, however, as is typical in my life, moments of incredible, take-your-breath-away beauty. Charles Dickens, he really did have it nailed. It is the worst of times, and the best of times. Life is not an endeavor for the faint of heart.
So, as for this whole, “taking stock of your life” bullshit just because the calendar is rolling over, to quote Grosse Pointe Blank, “leave your livestock alone”.
I will say this about my last year: I never, ever could have survived it without my nearest and dearest. I stand here and shout out your names so that all can hear – you are the life-rope.
Natasha, Mitchell, Elizabeth, Gemma, and Dad. You have the hearts of lions, and at times had to fight like ones. Thank you. And Kevin, Kevin, Kevin… there are no words. You are who I want to be like when I grow up.
So, no brave boasts about 2013. But babies, I am ready for it. I am stronger in the broken places. And have no one to thank but everyone for helping me make it so. Let’s go be marvelous. Let’s go shine.
Happy New Year.